The Jar

inglenookie:

A Sunday installment of Random Hannigram Conversations –

“Just in time. Dinner is almost ready.”

“Smells good.”

“Why don’t you set down those bags and open the wine. I’ll grab what I need.”

“I’m on it.”

“Will?”

“Yeah?”

“What’s this?”

“Oh. I got the idea from work.”

“You got the idea that we needed a glass jar?”

“It’s not just a jar.”

“Is it magic?”

“Smart ass.”

“Well don’t keep me in suspense.”

“It’s something that Jack started. You know how Bev is always throwing around the f-bomb.”

“Yes. Ms Katz’s vocabulary is quite memorable.”

“Jack thought it would –

– “Wait. You bought us a swear jar?”

“Not exactly.”

“I should hope not. I hardly need schooled on profanity.”

“Not profanity, no.”

“Will.”

“Hannibal.”

“I’m almost afraid to ask.”

“Metaphors.”

“What?”

“Your fucking metaphors, Hannibal. All the time.”

“I do not.”

“At least three before you even get out of bed.”

“A flagrant exaggeration.”

“Three, Hannibal.”

“If I’d known you were counting …”

“You’d stop? You couldn’t stop if you tried.”

“I just won’t talk.”

“That’s mature.”

“And a what – a metaphor jar. That’s mature?”

“If you don’t think you have a problem there’s nothing to worry about, is there?”

“I’m not worried in the least.”

“Good. That’s settled then.”

“Fine.”

“… You’re thinking of one right now, aren’t you?”

“Nope.”

“I can see your wheels turning.”

“You see no such thing.”

“What is it this time? Haven’t had a good natural disaster one in awhile. Always up for that.”

“Oh, I see. You complain and then you provoke.”

“Come on, tell me.”

“This is ridiculous. This is …”

“It’s right on the tip of your tongue.”

“…”

“If only I knew sooner how easy it was to make you shut up.”

“I know where you sleep.”

“Yep. Right upstairs. With a very scary man, so don’t get any ideas.”

“I’ll keep them to myself.”

“I doubt that.”